Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

New Study Reveals Inverse Relationship Between Penis Size And Times Word “Cuck” Is Used

One of the nation's leading scientific research organizations has concluded that...

Mueller Calls Rex Tillerson And Offers A ‘Sympathetic Ear And Accurate Stenographer’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump has fired his Secretary of...

Anti-Vaxxer Outraged Friends ‘Listened to Common Sense and Science,’ and Had Their Baby Vaccinated

SPRING FALLS, CALIFORNIA -- 46-year-old California resident Dennis Myers calls himself...

Betsy DeVos Is Pretty Sure She’s Heard Of This School Thing You Keep Talking About

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last night, 60 Minutes aired an interview that...

5 Ways Your Sex Robot Is Telling You They’re Ready To Be Programmed To Fuck Other People

So you're in love, and everything's going well. The romance is...

Future SpaceX Projects Will Be Funded With Sales Of New Cologne: “Elon’s Musk”

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); This morning, billionaire entrepreneur and inventor Elon...

Poll: Most Americans ‘Totally Cool With’ North Korea Keeping Trump

Yesterday, South Korea announced that after having talks with North Korea,...

Tomi Lahren Says The Wakanda Forever Hashtag Is ‘Just Like The KKK’

VALLE DE PUTANA RACISTA, CALIFORNIA -- Today right-wing firebrand commentator Tinseltown...