Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Poll: Most Americans ‘Totally Cool With’ North Korea Keeping Trump

Yesterday, South Korea announced that after having talks with North Korea,...

Tomi Lahren Says The Wakanda Forever Hashtag Is ‘Just Like The KKK’

VALLE DE PUTANA RACISTA, CALIFORNIA -- Today right-wing firebrand commentator Tinseltown...

Town Douche Wonders Why There’s ‘Only 364’ International Men’s Days Each Year

CAPE FALLS, OHIO -- Today is International Women's Day, but for...

A Complete List Of Every President Sued By A Porn Star

This week, adult film star Stormy Daniels, whose real name is...

Trump Says He’s Having A Hard Time Hearing Paul Ryan Criticize Steel Tariffs With Mouth Full

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today President Trump told reporters that he hasn't...

Awkard! Donald In Hot Water After He Calls Ivanka “Stormy” At The Worst Time Possible!

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, the White House was witness to...

Report: Melania Trump Entered Country On “Bride of Frankenstein” Visa

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Because of his administration's focus on immigration, President...

Sam Nunberg Intercepts And Snorts More Mysterious White Powder Sent to Don Jr.

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- After a bizarre, freewheeling string of...

Red State School Hires Heavily Armed Vietnam Vet And Drifter To Teach U.S. History

HOPE, WASHINGTON -- A small Washington town has taken the issue...

David Avocado Wolfe In Critical Condition After Apparent Accidental Crystal Chakra Voodoo Overdose

AURA CITY, WOOSCONSIN -- Local authorities and doctors are confirming at...