Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Trump Says He’ll Have Mexican American Soldiers Pay For His Southern Wall

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- During the 2016 presidential campaign, one of now...

Trump Mistress Feels Left Out Because He Didn’t Compare Her To His Daughter When They Were About To Fuck

One of President Donald Trump's mistresses has released a statement saying...

Trump Says Obama Used ‘Sharia Voodoo’ And Forced Him To Ban Bump Stocks Under Mind Control

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last week, President Donald Trump shocked many in...

Local Woman Still Not Interested In Seeing A Digital Image Of Your Penis

HARPER VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- It's not that 28 year old Cheryl...

Mike Cernovich Thuper Proud Of His Award For Journalithtic Integrity From Breitbart

ORANTH COUNTY, CALIFORNIA -- Right-wing provocateur and alleged journalitht Mike Thernovich...

Trump Announces U.S. Will Celebrate Flat Earth Day Instead

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning as he...

House Republican Explains Why Mocking And Attacking Survivors Of Gun Massacres Is Good For America

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This weekend, massive marches were held in the...

Rick Santorum’s Froth Levels Critical After Meltdown Over March For Our Lives

COAL HOLE, PENNSYLVANIA -- First responders and medical professionals in the...