Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Dr. Jenny McCarthy Hired As White House Special Counsel On Alternative Medicine

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump announced a new hiring today....

Typing “Go F##k Yourself” On Facebook Now Unleashes A Stream Of Cute Little Animated Dildos

SWILLYCORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Social media giant Facebook is constantly trying...

Typing “Go Fuck Yourself” On Facebook Now Unleashes A Stream Of Cute Little Animated Dildos

SWILLYCORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Social media giant Facebook is constantly trying...

The 9 Most Dangerous, Least Talked About Side Effects Of Vaccinating Your Children

Big Pharma, the government, and "doctors" all tell you that vaccinating...

USPS Announces New “Whatever” Stamps For Customers Who Just Can’t Right Now

The United States Postal Service has announced that they are adding...

Post Office Announces New “Whatever” Stamps For Customers Who Just Can’t Right Now

The United States Postal Service has announced that they are adding...

Trump Says National Guard Needed To Protect The Border To Stop Taco Bell’s Invasion Of America

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, President Donald Trump signed an executive order...

Elon Musk Developing New Social Media Platform MySpaceX.com

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- This morning, a new social media...

Right-Winger Outraged Lazy Liberals Couldn’t Create Single Conspiracy Theory About YouTube Shooting or Shooter

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- Self-proclaimed right-wing provocateur Jethro Bohiggins hosts...

Sinclair Broadcasting’s Robo-Anchor 5000 Says He Has Pre-Programmed Mind Of His Own

HUNT VALLEY, MARYLAND -- A viral video put together by Deadspin is making...