Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Trump Regrets Lying About Lying About Telling Michael Cohen to Lie About Him Lying

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When Donald Trump came down from the White...

Trump Gave Kim Jong-Un List of Blue States He’d Prefer NK Aim Nukes At

AIR FORCE INDIVIDUAL-1 -- During his meeting with North Korean dictator...

Doctors Unsure When or If Cohen’s Foot Can Be Removed from Trump’s Rectum

WASHINGTON. D.C. -- At the time of publication, White House medical...

Courier Hands Cohen Check Signed by President Trump Just Before Entering Capitol Building

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The collective political world is at a stand...

Trump Packed Two Pairs of Dress Bone Spurs for Vietnam Summit

VIETNAM -- No one can ever accuse President Donald Trump of...

Bablyon Bee Drops All Pretense and Converts to Conservative Christian Mega-Church

LAKE PROPAGANDA, MICHIGAN --  The online satirical publication known as The...

Jeff Sessions Says Spike Lee Should Be Arrested for Making Joints, Not Given Awards

WHITE HOOD, ALABAMA -- Former Attorney General Jeff Sessions was stopped...

A Scientific Breakdown of All the Racism in Spike Lee’s Oscar Acceptance Speech

Last night, iconic film director Spike Lee made personal history when...

Putin Unsure He’ll Invite Trump to D.C. 4th of July Celebration

MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- Over the weekend, President Donald Trump announced that...