Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Mexico Says They’ll Pay for U.S. Special Olympics Team

MEXICO CITY, MEXICO -- The Federal Government of Mexico has stepped-in...

Barr Says Mueller Report Exonerates Hillary Clinton for Benghazi, Uranium One, Assassin Career

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- First Attorney General William Barr summarized the Robert...

AG Bar Says Mueller Report Exonerates Jussie Smollett

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The topsy-turvy, freewheeling, unpredictable nature of the major...

Barr Says Mueller Report Exonerates Trump for Saying Mexico Would Pay for Border Wall

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Attorney General Barr is not done exonerating President...

William Barr Writes 4 Page Letter Summarizing Harry Potter Novels and Exonerating Voldemort

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Attorney General William Barr has only been back...

Trump Replaces Entire Cabinet With Hosts of “Fox & Friends”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a development sure to send shock waves...

Low IQ Man Can’t Handle The Hectic Pace of California

Twin Falls, ID -- Former California resident Harley Barton gave up...

Trump Orders Creation of New Government Search Engine Called “Tru-gle”

WASHINGTON, D.C. --  President Donald Trump signed an executive order directing...

Trump Says He’s Waiting for the Picture Version of Mueller Report Before Issuing Response

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The White House has issued the following statement...