Totally Bulls*it News

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project...

North Challenges LaPierre to AR-15 Duel for Control of NRA

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- There's a power struggle developing at the National...

Trump Considering Order to Change “No Way, Josè” to “Not a Chance, Lance”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump announced that he...

NBC To Issue Presidential Trigger Warning Before Every Episode Of Saturday Night Live

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Since becoming President, Donald Trump has...

6 Important Warning Signs That You Might Have Windmill Cancer

Windmill cancer, or wind cancer as it's also referred to, is...

Trump to Give Robert E. Lee Posthumous Medal of Freedom

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Hours after heaping praise on Confederate General Robert...

Stephen Miller Wants ‘Brown Skinned’ Americans to Wear Special Sombrero Patches

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- White House Nationalist Insecurity Adviser Stephen Miller is...

Man Fears Losing Extraction Job at Bovine Fertility Clinic to Automation

TAUREAU VANIR BAY, WISCONSIN -- 42 year old Jack Poolenpud has...

Joe Biden Offers to Just Push His Old Desk Chair to the White House Next November

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, former Vice-President Joe Biden threw his hat...

Pelosi Wishes ‘The Founders Had Given Us Some Tool by Which to Hold a President Accountable’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi told reporters...

President Trump Orders Dictionary to Change “Checks and Balances” to “Presidential Harassment”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A furious President Donald Trump angrily assembled members...