Totally Bulls*it News

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project...

Barr Says Mueller Report Exonerates Trump for Saying Mexico Would Pay for Border Wall

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Attorney General Barr is not done exonerating President...

William Barr Writes 4 Page Letter Summarizing Harry Potter Novels and Exonerating Voldemort

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Attorney General William Barr has only been back...

Trump Replaces Entire Cabinet With Hosts of “Fox & Friends”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a development sure to send shock waves...

Low IQ Man Can’t Handle The Hectic Pace of California

Twin Falls, ID -- Former California resident Harley Barton gave up...

Trump Orders Creation of New Government Search Engine Called “Tru-gle”

WASHINGTON, D.C. --  President Donald Trump signed an executive order directing...

Trump Says He’s Waiting for the Picture Version of Mueller Report Before Issuing Response

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The White House has issued the following statement...

Indiana School Uses Live Ammunition in Active Shooter Training

MT. VERNON, INDIANA -- Over in the Hoosier State, quite a...

Trump Demands Disneyland Post ICE Guards at Entrance to Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When Disneyland Park opens its new Star Wars:...

J.K. Rowling Says You Didn’t Actually Read Harry Potter Novels

LONDONSHERRY DOWNTONSHIRE, ENGLAND -- Author J.K. Rowling has quite a close,...

God Orders Recall of Bibles Autographed by Trump

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Larry "God" Schumway has announced an...