Totally Bulls*it News

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project...

Man Can’t Seem to Get Stoned Enough to Find Ann Coulter Funny or Intelligent

Everyone's favorite wicked witch without striped socks, Ann Coulter, recently said during a debate that pot makes you "retarded."

Prospective Immigrant Shows Off Two English Words He Learned Just For Stephen Miller

This prospective Syrian immigrant doesn't speak a lot of English just yet, but he speaks just enough for his point to come shining through.

Oscar the Grouch’s Fat, Orange, Racist Cousin Calls His Trash Can a ‘Real White House’

TV's beloved Oscar the Grouch gets a visit from his racist, xenophobic, orange cousin who tells him his trashcan is a White House.

Trump Seeks Putin’s Input on When He Should Sign Russia Sanctions Bill

With an overwhelmingly bipartisan sanctions bill just lingering on his desk, President Trump explains he needs input from a good friend.

Tammy Lahren Bashes Highway Safety Laws While Putting on Her Seatbelt

Tammy Lahren told a Politicon audience she's still on her parents' insurance, which she couldn't be without that nasty Obamacare thing she hates.

Sarah Palin Scolds Spicer, Scaramucci, Priebus For Their Lack of Work Ethic

Former Alaska governor and reality-TV star Sarah Palin takes issue with Scaramucci, Priebus, and Spicer walking out on President Trump.

Sean Spicer Hands Scaramucci Participation Trophy as He Exists White House Press Office

Outgoing communications director Anthony Scaramucci and former Press Secretary Sean Spicer shared a moment of commiseration.

After Obamacare Repeal Fails, Ted Cruz Says He’ll Have to Return to Killing ‘Zodiac Style Instead’

Senator Ted Cruz tells a church congregation he's got to go back to doing things the old school way, after the GOP can't repeal Obamacare.

Woman’s Eyebrows Relieved to Be Second Least Believable Thing In The Room With President Trump

An exclusive interview with a very famous pair of eyebrows that were fortunate enough to be just a foot away from the president.

ISIS, Taliban Issue Joint Statement in Support of Trump’s Transgender Military Ban

President Trump may have angered a lot of Americans with his transgender military ban, but some people in other parts of the world love it.