Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Kim Jong-un Purchases Michael Jordan

Pyongyang, North Korea -- The Official new agency of the DPRK...

ICE to Update Agents’ Badges, Uniforms, and Hoods

WASHINGTON, D.C.-- The Department of Homeland Security has announced that later...

Congresswoman Suggests Trump ‘Go Back to the Overflowing Toilet’ He Came From

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Congresswoman Rashida Tlaib (D-MI) was stopped on her...

Bigoted Woman Tired of Being Called a Bigot for Supporting a Bigoted President

LA CARNE SACO LLENO DE MIERDA, ARIZONA --  Radio personality June...

Trump Orders Social Media Companies to Require Users to Like and Follow Him

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's been no big secret around the nation's...

Tomi Lahren Starting Her Own Shoe Company

CHICA RUBIA CHINGADERA, CALIFORNIA -- When Nike announced that, after being...

Obama Thinks Deep Down Trump is Jealous of His Much Bigger Twitter Follower Count

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's not really a big secret on the...

Barack Obama Explains Why His Labor Secretary Didn’t Step Down Over Coddling a Rich Pedophile

A SECRET SOCIALIST SHARIA BUNKER, SOMEWHERE IN AMERICA -- Today, President...

Epstein and Acosta Spotted Filling Out Employment Apps at Chuck E. Cheese’s

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Eye witnesses have spotted former Labor Secretary Alexander...