Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Ken Starr Sees a ‘Stunning Lack of ‘____ jobs’ In Impeachment Case Against Trump

WACO, TEXAS -- Ken Starr became a household name while he...

Rubio Says OJ Was Just Probably Just Kidding Around With His Knife

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- While out jogging around town, Senator Marco Rubio...

Poll: Majority Think President Trump Pulling Out 41 Years Too Late

A new snap poll, conducted by polling company We Poll You So...

Quiz: Which of These Big, Dumb, Obnoxious, Lying Idiots Thinks He’s Above the Law?

Things are getting really complicated, heady, and for some, perhaps even...

Congressman Argues It Should Be Unconstitutional to ‘Tattle’ On a President For His Unconstitutional Acts

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Congressman Tom Thompaulsen, being interviewed on ABC radio this morning,...

Jim Jordan: “We Can’t Impeach Trump Before Impeaching Joe Biden”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Rep. Gym Jordan told reporters this morning that...

New York to Rename Public Toilet After Trump

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Perhaps to quiet a growing controversy,...

Total Moron Who Screeches About Socialism Asks Authoritarian Communists for Help

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A titanically stupid idiot, who happens to also...