Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Medical Staff Unable to Extricate Lt. Col. Vindman’s Entire Foot from Nunes’ Cinnamon Hole

WASHINGTON, D.C -- Before the second impeachment hearing of the day...

Devin Nunes: “It’s Time to Impeach The Media”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Rep. Devin Nunes (R-CA), the ranking member of...

Starbucks Unveils Hanukkah, Kwanza, Church of Satan Holiday Cups

SEATTLE, WASHINGTON -- Each year, coffee giant Starbucks unveils its holiday...

Trump Supporter Podcaster Won’t Camp Out In Front Of WalMart Unless They Rename It “White Friday”

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- Jethro Bohiggins is an unabashed, self-described...

Turkey Says “Thanks, But No Thanks” to Trump’s Presidential Pardon

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's been a longstanding tradition in America for...

Report: Yovanovich’s Are Way Bigger Than Trump’s

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The National Institute For Reporting Stuff and Things...

Clinton Circling Roger Stone’s Court Proceeding Shouting “Gonna Lock Him Up!”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Former Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton and...

Trump: “I Wasn’t Trying to Intimidate Yovanovitch, I Was Trying To Scare Her Into Shutting Up!”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- During the first part of Ambassador Marie Yovanovitch's...

Devin Nunes and Jim Jordan Unsure Whose Turn It Is To Publicly Fluff Trump’s Nads

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The second day of open impeachment hearings in...

Jim Jordan: “President Trump’s The Kind of Sexual Predator I Have a Duty and Instinct to Protect At All Costs”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, Congressman Jim Jordan told a conservative...