Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Hillary Clinton Offers To Represent President Trump In His Impeachment Trial

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Former Secretary of State, and winner...

Obama Offers to Print Trump’s Articles of Impeachment on His Birth Certificate

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Former President Barack H. Obama (D-Kenya) has reached...

Chick-Fil-A Introduces New “Merry Christmas” Covfefe Cup

ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- Fast food purveyor Chick-Fil-A announced last week that...

A Complete List of Offenses in House Impeachment Report GOP Would Forgive if Obama or Hillary Did Them

The House Intelligence Committee has released its highly-anticipated report, following weeks...

6 Things as Perfect as Trump’s Ukraine Call

Throughout the Ukraine scandal that has rocked the Trump administration and...

Which Barnyard Animal Does Devin Nunes NOT Fuck?

Recently, Satirical Facts published a piece entitled "Can We Bait Goat Fucker Devin...

Pat Robertson Reminds Christians They’ll Go To Hell for Loving Baby Yoda and Baby Jesus

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has a stern warning...

Santa Asks 58 Year Old If She Still Believes Trump is a Real President

THE NORTH POLE, EARTH -- On Christmas night last year, President...