Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Jordan, Gohmert, Collins Smugly Confident They’ve Convinced America to Impeach Hunter Biden

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- "We did it, guys. We really fuckin' did...

Matt Gaetz Blew a .28 on Breathalyzer Right Before Bringing Up Hunter Biden Driving Under the Influence

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, the House Judiciary Committee debated the...

Sen. Lindsey Graham Told Judiciary Committee Exact Length He’ll Go To Defending President Trump

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Senate Judiciary Committee held a hearing today...

White House Demands Democrats Add Pictures to Articles of Impeachment So Trump Understands Them

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The White House released a letter this morning,...

Pat Robertson Reminds Christians They’ll Go To Hell for Loving Baby Yoda and Baby Jesus

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has a stern warning...

Trump: “The IG Report Concludes I Should Be Able To Round-Up and Execute Democrats on 5th Avenue”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Trump was spotted this morning pacing around...

Bill Barr: “Non-Whites Who Don’t Own Land Voting Sets a Dangerous Precedent of Self-Governance”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Attorney General William Barr said in a radio...

White House: Articles of Impeachment Don’t Have Enough Pictures So Trump Can’t Understand Them

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The White House released a letter this morning,...

Coastal Elite Wisconsin Dairy Farmer Supports Trump’s Impeachment

PÂTURAGE DE LAIT COUNTY, WISCONSIN -- 56-year-old Carol Heffermère never considered...