Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Coronavirus Threat Could Mean Millions of Americans Don’t Pretend to Be Irish Stereotypes This Year

All across America, cities and towns are holding emergency council meetings...

Man Uncomfortable With How Similar His Stepson’s Pornhub Search History Is to His Own

VALLE DE CHINGANDA FAMILIA, ARIZONA -- Six years ago, when he...

Mike Pence Was Looking for Coronavirus Videos and Accidentally Watched Pornhub for 12 Hours

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources close to the situation are reporting that...

Local Man Not Sure He’ll Get a Return on All the Money He Invested in His Son

CARMEL VALLEY RANCH, CALIFORNIA -- He never expected to recoup every...

Quarantined Cruise Passenger Says Ship Talent Show ‘Far Worse’ Than Coronavirus Outbreak

ST. FRANK, CALIFORNIA -- When she boarded the Queen's Line cruise...