Totally Bulls*it News

I Tried the New McMoron Combo Meal. 0/10

By no means would I call myself a "gourmet." Maybe a "gourmand," but I'm not really even sure about that. Whatever the label you...

Local MAGA-Boy Confused How He Got ‘The COVID’ After Taking Trump’s Snakeoil for Three Years

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- Right-ing Youtube star, podcaster, singer/songwriter and...

Trump Says He’s ‘Heard Good Things’ About Treating Coronavirus With Blowtorches and Flamethrowers

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump continued to give unlicensed medical...

Stupidfuck Training to Become Dumbfuck

MORON VALLEY, MINNESOTA -- Marcus Palumbozo is a stupidfuck. He has...

Whiny Bitch Says He’d Suck Less at COVID-19 Response If Media Wasn’t So Mean To His Baby Ass

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A big, fat, whiny, entitled, spoiled bitch stood...

Pro-Life Supreme Court Justices Rule ‘Not So Much’ When It Comes to Wisconsin Voters

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a 5-4 decision split down ideological lines,...

CDC Urges Trump Supporters to Stop Sharing Hoods

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In what has been one of the busiest...

4 Ways to Tell If You Use the Word “Sheeple” Too Much

There are certain words in the English language that are categorically...

Participants Agree Zoom Orgy Only 30% Less Creepy Than In-Person One

Participants in an orgy via the group video chat app "Zoom"...

Pro-Trump Televangelist Wonders if COVID-19 God’s Punishment for Impeaching Trump

HOLY OAK, VIRGINIA -- It's not often that Rev. Bill Millen...

White House Adds Drs. Giuliani, Hannity, and Lahren to Coronavirus Task Force

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump announced today that his coronavirus...