Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Trump Wants USPS to Charge Democrats $200 a Stamp Until November 4th

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Trump administration's continuous changes at the United...

Can You Spot All The Similarities These Two Share That Make Trump Question Their Eligibility?

This man's name is Barack Hussein Obama. You might remember him...

Cowboys Change Cheerleader Squad Name to “Super Spreaders”

DALLASS, TEXASS -- This week, Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones --...

Trump: “Harris and Biden Are Dangerous Marxist Commies in Wall Street’s Back Pocket!”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Lashing out at the Democratic Party's presidential ticket...

Trump Presses Thighland’s President for Dirt on Kamala Harris

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- He's calling it another one of his "perfect...

Back Off Ben Shapiro. I Know For a Fact His Wife’s Pussy Gets Wet.

The following was opinion essay was written in sum and in...

CDC Releases New Urgent Guidelines for “Safe and Healthy” Circle Jerking

ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- The Centers for Disease Control have issued brand...

Trump Appoints Himself CEO of TikTok

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's no big secret on the Hill that...