Totally Bulls*it News

Jesus Told Me Only “Fascist Incel Dorks” Don’t Like Separation of Church and State

"We told them to pay Caesar what's due to Caesar for a reason. Me-stianity and politics don't mix." Jesus Hubert Christ is not a fan of Project...

Florida Drug Dealer Faces Financial Hardships

PALM BEACH, FLORIDA -- Ronald Crabtree, a low level Oxycontin street...

God Cancels Rush Limbaugh

PALM BEACH, FLORIDA -- In breaking news, we have learned that conservatives...

Satan Tells Limbaugh to ‘Fuck Off Out Of Here’

HELL -- Satan "Billy" Beelzebub does not want recently deceased radio...

Planned Parenthood Will Start Giving Away Free Guns With Abortions

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In response to what can only described as...

Think Your Political Party Has Become a Death Cult of Personality? We Have Five Ways You Can Tell.

Times are, well, kinda craycray right now, aren't they? Seems like...

Vaccinated Bureaucrat Making Six Figure Income Has Thoughts on Your Kids Rushing Back to School

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Rep. Tom Thompaulsen (R-MT) is "sick and tired"...

Jim Jordan Blames Cancel Culture for His Miniscule Dick

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Congressman Jim Jordan has a very, very, very,...

Illinois GOP Censures Abe Lincoln

STONEWALL, ILLINOIS -- The Illinois Republican Party has been on a...

McConnell Blames OJ For His Ex-Wife’s Multiple Stab Wounds, Says He’s Would Have Voted Not Guilty

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (Q-Moscow) weighed in...