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Ashley’s Diary, Hunter’s Laptop, Obama’s Birth Certificate, and the Bible: All the Facts I Need

The following editorial was written by right-wing commentator and Trump 2024 surrogate Dustin Pewpsin....

Betrayal? RFK’s Brain Worms Just Endorsed Donald Trump

"Much like how an Evangelical Christian can read the Bible and not know anything...
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Trump Supporter: His Cousin Convinced Him to Get Vaccinated By Withholding Sex

FT. IVERMECTIN, KENTUCKY -- For months, the Biden administration has grappled with how, exactly,...

Santa Claus Will Require Proof of Vaccination Before Delivering Toys This Year

THE NORTH POLE -- Elected officials like Sen. Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun) and Rep. Marjhorsey...

Are You Selfish or Just a Puss-Weed For Not Getting Vaccinated or Wearing a Mask?

It's a question as old as time itself. Well, it's as old as how...

Med Tech Company Develops “Trump 5000” Ventilator With Built-In MAGA Hat

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- A company that specializes in designing medical technology announced...

Club Owner Not Sure Who This “Jim Breuer” Guy Is, But Is Requiring Audience Vaccination Anyway

"You're saying he's done something remotely comedic in the last 20 years?" HARDIHAR FALLS, MINNESOTA...

Dr. Alex Jones Prescribes 30 mg of Chemtrails and Frog De-Gayer for Joe Rogan’s COVID

FT. DIPSHIT, TEXAS -- Yesterday, to the shock of absolutely nobody who passed high...

Urologist Fears America’s Penis May Never Fully Recover from COVID-19 Delta Surge

Dr. Richard Schvantz has been a licensed, board certified urologist for over 40 years,...

Are You a Victim of Tyranny, or Being Politely Urged to Get a Life Saving Vaccine?

The COVID-19 delta variant is raging throughout America, and particularly in certain vaccine hesitant...

Satan Issues Mask Mandate for Unvaccinated MAGAs

HELL, ETERNITY -- Bob "Satan" McGee has issued a new mask mandate that applies...

Unvaccinated America First Patriot Refuses to Wear a Mask or Condom While Raw-Dogging His Cousin

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- In an interview soon to be published in American...

Tucker Carlson Wants to Get One More COVID-19 Vaccine Before He Endorses Them

Fox News host and sentient toilet film Tucker Carlson told his audience last night...

At Brian Kilmeade’s Suggestion, U.S. Disbands Its Military

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a fast-moving, and perhaps quite shocking turn of events, the...

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Ashley’s Diary, Hunter’s Laptop, Obama’s Birth Certificate, and the Bible: All the Facts I Need

The following editorial was written by right-wing commentator and Trump 2024 surrogate Dustin Pewpsin....

Betrayal? RFK’s Brain Worms Just Endorsed Donald Trump

"Much like how an Evangelical Christian can read the Bible and not know anything...

Every Former President Ranked from Least to Most Felony Convictions

Our regular readers will likely recall that part of our mission statement here --...

When Will Biden Call Off His War on Rapey Conmen Coup Conspirators?

The following editorial was written by Jethro Bohiggins -- a pro-MAGA singer/songwriter and podcast...