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U.S. Politics

Betrayal? RFK’s Brain Worms Just Endorsed Donald Trump

"Much like how an Evangelical Christian can read the Bible and not know anything...
History

Every Former President Ranked from Least to Most Felony Convictions

Our regular readers will likely recall that part of our mission statement here --...
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Tech

Twitter Temporarily Suspends Horse Faced Anti-Vaxxer’s Account

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Horse faced cave troll and freshman Rep. Marjorie Taylor...
The Democrats

Cuomo Resigns, Plans to Spend More Time Groping Someone Else’s Family

GRABBINY, NEW YORK -- Gov. Andrew Cuomo of New York (D) announced his official...
Science & Medicine

Florida’s Child COVID Positivity Higher Than Its Adult Literacy

TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDUH -- Children in the America's Dong State are more likely contract COVID-19...
U.S. Politics

Cruz: “Donald Trump Understood That The Constitution is For Cucks”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This weekend Sen. Dick Durbin (D-IL) appeared on CNN and divulged...
Science & Medicine

Greene: Car Seat Laws are ‘Tyranny’ and Parents Should ‘Resist’ Them

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Cloven-footed freshman Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) told a group of...
Conservative Media

Meghan McCain’s Hairdresser Thankful They No Longer Have to Send Coded Cries for Help

Since 2017, Meghan McCain's hairdresser has been sending coded signals to audience members watching The...
Science & Medicine

DeSantis Undecided Whether to Continue to Do Nothing, or Pretend to Do Something About COVID

TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDUH -- His state is the new epicenter of America's fourth wave of...
The Democrats

Cruz: “Why Is Joe Biden So Afraid to Call My Wife Ugly?”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senator Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun) blasted President Joe Biden today, accusing him...
U.S. Politics

Mike Lindell Blasts CNN Reporter for ‘Shamelessly’ Debunking His Conspiracy Theories With Truth

This week, MyPillow founder and CEO Mike Lindell sat down for an interview with...
Science & Medicine

CDC: Increased Risk of COVID Infection After Exposure to Blathering, Right-Wing Morons

ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- The CDC held an urgent press conference this morning during which...
MAGA News

Trump Pressured DOJ to Sue Biden’s Blue States for Hurting His Feelings

Details of the days leading up to and following the 2020 presidential election are...
U.S. Politics

AZ Audit Finds Two Million Ballots Filled Out in Unicorn Blood

LOS MORONOS, ARIZONA -- This morning, Cyber Ninjas announced that their audit of Arizona's...
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U.S. Politics

Betrayal? RFK’s Brain Worms Just Endorsed Donald Trump

"Much like how an Evangelical Christian can read the Bible and not know anything...
History

Every Former President Ranked from Least to Most Felony Convictions

Our regular readers will likely recall that part of our mission statement here --...
Criminal Justice

When Will Biden Call Off His War on Rapey Conmen Coup Conspirators?

The following editorial was written by Jethro Bohiggins -- a pro-MAGA singer/songwriter and podcast...
Criminal Justice

The RNC Will Officially Change Its Platform to Be Very, Very, Very, Very Soft on Crime

"...you need to do what happens to my TOTALLY NORMAL AND ABOVE-AVERAGE LENGTH PEEN...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)