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I Asked a Klansman If He’s Voting For Biden Since They’re Both Democrats. He Punched Me.

"Man, it's really true what they say about Democrats. They're snowflakes." We all know a...

For Conservatives, Fart Naps Are Quickly Replacing Power Naps

"While some might casually observe the irony in someone who belittles his opponent as...
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Hillary Clinton Is Circling Ivanka Trump’s House Shouting “Lock Her Up”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Authorities and eyewitnesses close to the situation are confirming at the...

Hillary Clinton Circling Omarosa’s Building Shouting, ‘Lock Her Up!’

At the time of publication, eyewitnesses are reporting that former Secretary of State Hillary...

Donald Trump Jr. Plans To Invoke Attorney-Dumbfuck Privilege At Every Future Russia Hearing

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Yesterday, Donald Trump Jr., the president's son spent hours...

Hillary Spotted in NYC, Circling Donald Trump Jr.’s Building & Shouting ‘But HIS Emails!’

As news broke of his own email problems, Hillary Clinton circled Donald Trump Jr.'s block to mock him over them.

Preparations Underway for President Trump’s First Date With Putin

At the G20 summit later this week, Trump and Putin will get a chance to have their first official date since Russia helped Trump win last year's election.

White House July 4th Festivities Delayed While Spicer Finds Trump’s Lapel Pin

The White House staff was in a frenzy as the big Fourth of July plans had to be delayed while they tracked down Trump's lapel pin.

Doctors Rushing to Remove Sally Yates’ Foot from Ted Cruz’s Rectum

During her testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee, former acting Attorney General Sally Yates rammed her foot deep inside Ted Cruz's ass.

FBI Director Decides He’s ‘Okay With Voters Deciding Election After All’

James Comey has a change of heart. Again.

Voter Weighs Whether New, Potentially Meaningless Emails Mean Orange Diarrhea Should Be President

Do emails matter more than keeping an unhinged bag of diarrhea out of the Oval Office?

Lesser Publicized Excerpts From Colin Powell’s Leaked Emails

Some lesser publicized bits from Colin Powell's leaked emails.

House GOP Gives New ‘Scandal’ Official Title: Hillmailghazigate

Hillary Clinton's emails will now be the subject of an official Republican-branded scandal investigation.

NSA Employee Laughs His Balls Off at Hillary Clinton Email ‘Scandal’

One NSA employee tells The Chute why he doesn't consider the Hillary Clinton email scandal a real scandal.

Latest articles

I Asked a Klansman If He’s Voting For Biden Since They’re Both Democrats. He Punched Me.

"Man, it's really true what they say about Democrats. They're snowflakes." We all know a...

For Conservatives, Fart Naps Are Quickly Replacing Power Naps

"While some might casually observe the irony in someone who belittles his opponent as...

Surely, We Don’t Expect Republicans to Suck Their Cult Leader Off All The Way from D.C.?

"Does anyone know how hard it is to have a long-distance relationship, much less...

A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden

"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that...