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Christians

I’m a Single Issue Voter, and It’s Enabling Right-Wing Authoritarians If I Don’t Get My Way

The following piece was submitted to us by reader Gary Neophite, who describes himself...

Alabama Authorities Are Looking for Me Because They Found Out I Had a Wet Dream

"I can't tell you where I'm at, or how long I'll be here, but...
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Jesus Writes Op-Ed In Favor of Removing Trump From Office

Jesus Hubert Christ made headlines over the past weekend by writing and publishing a...

God Orders Recall of Bibles Autographed by Trump

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Larry "God" Schumway has announced an immediate and emergency...

Satanic Goat Sacrifice and Skunk Fucking Cult Says Religious Liberty Task Force Allows Them To Discriminate Against Christians

LA ORINA DA SATANÁS, ARIZONA -- Seth Lindstrom, The High Chieftain of The Temple...

Kirk Cameron Renounces Faith; Ready To ‘Start Picking Up All That Sweet Growing Pains P**n.’

In the 1980s, Kirk Cameron was one of the hottest young stars in Hollywood. Cameron...

General Trump Declares Victory In The War On Christmas

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A strident and victorious General Donald Trump -- President of The...

God To Renew Just 20% Of Alabama Republicans’ Christian Memberships

"This guy takes the hypocritical taco."

After Obamacare Repeal Fails, Ted Cruz Says He’ll Have to Return to Killing ‘Zodiac Style Instead’

Senator Ted Cruz tells a church congregation he's got to go back to doing things the old school way, after the GOP can't repeal Obamacare.

Preacher Who Prayed With Trump Wakes Up With Third Degree Hand Burns

Reverend Malloy recently "laid hands" on President Trump, and has burns on his hands to prove it.

Western Wall Was “Unimpressed” By Trump’s Hand Size

During its visit with President Trump, Israel's Western Wall noted that it was not overly impressed by the commander in chief's mitts.

Asked About Trump’s “Religious Freedom” Order, Jesus Christ Does the Jack-Off Gesture

Don't ask Jesus Christ about the religious freedom order Donald Trump just signed. Not unless you want a sarcastic reply.

God: Americans Who Support Taking 24 Million Poor People’s Health Coverage Away ‘Not Eligible’ For Christianity

God and his son Jesus "Hubert" are none too pleased with Americans calling themselves "Christian" and then taking things from the sick and poor.

Latest articles

I’m a Single Issue Voter, and It’s Enabling Right-Wing Authoritarians If I Don’t Get My Way

The following piece was submitted to us by reader Gary Neophite, who describes himself...

Alabama Authorities Are Looking for Me Because They Found Out I Had a Wet Dream

"I can't tell you where I'm at, or how long I'll be here, but...

I Just Got a Sneak Peak at Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Signature Shoe Line

"I lied to him and told him that I was a friend of the...

Why Aren’t Liberals Grateful to Live in the World’s Most Exceptional Shooting Range?

The following editorial was written by right-wing commentator and former NRA executive board member...