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Alabama GOP Wants to Outlaw Scrambled, Fried, or Omelette Eggs
PORT TONTOCOMO UNACAJA DEROCAS, ALABAMA -- In a sleepy Alabama port town, State Rep. Tom Thompaulsen (R), welcomes our reporter to his favorite local...
Trump Orders SCOTUS to Declare Him ‘More Co-Equaler’ Than Congress
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Unites States of America seems to be sliding ever quicker into a full-blown Constitutional crisis, and President Donald Trump told...
Bablyon Bee Converts to Conservative Christian Mega-Church
LAKE PROPAGANDA, MICHIGAN -- The online satirical publication known as The Babylon Bee has decided to stop publishing fake news stories aimed at a decidedly...
Town Shocked When Man Declines to Use Penis as Excuse to Tell Woman What...
MAPLE VALLEY, OHIO -- Residents of a town in Ohio are reportedly still in shock over developments that the mayor has called "utterly stunning."
Late...
Study Shows 100% of Abortions Still None of Your F**king Business
Several red states are in various stages of implementing sweeping abortion bans aimed squarely at eventually toppling the 1973 landmark Roe vs. Wade Supreme Court decision...
Trump Asks Supreme Court to Officially Declare Him Above The Law and ‘More Co-Equaler’...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Unites States of America seems to be sliding ever quicker into a full-blown Constitutional crisis, and President Donald Trump told...
Shop-Vac Building New Manufacturing Facilities in Georgia, Alabama, Missouri, Ohio
WILLIAMSPORT, PENNSYLVANIA -- Citing a "brand new, previously unforeseen need in the market," Shop-Vac will be building new manufacturing plants in Georgia, Alabama, Missouri,...
New Alabama Mom Can’t Wait to Grow Up and Watch Her Son Grow Up
CORNPONE, ALABAMA -- Susie Grandstrom is expecting her first child sometime later this year. In the interest of protecting her complete identity, we're using...
Local Republican Can’t Wait to Share His Awful Views of Rape, Incest With You
LAKE CHAUVIN, FLORIDA -- Lance Westmund is a 52-year-old self-described Born-Again Christian, Republican, gun owner, and current line cook at the local Chik-Fil-A in his...
Alabama Rapist Can Finally Have The Family He Never Had
Sumiton, AL -- Unemployed handyman and rapist George Reed Wambles of Sumiton, Alabama says he's happy with Alabama's new abortion ban. The new law,...
