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Dozens of Secret Service Members Volunteer to Be Next Ones Fired from Trump Administration
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This week, President Donald Trump's administration saw quite a shakeup in the Department of Homeland Security.
DHS Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen was asked...
AG Bar Says Mueller Report Exonerates Jussie Smollett
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The topsy-turvy, freewheeling, unpredictable nature of the major news headlines this week just took yet another turn for the completely unforeseen....
Man Tying Shoes Sends Tomi Lahren Into Rage-Induced Coma
DULLARD, TEXAS -- Representatives for right-wing firebrand conservative commentator Tabasco Lahren are confirming at the time of publication that she is in stable condition,...
Jussie Smollett Hired by InfoWars
TINFOIL, TEXAS -- Jussie Smollett appears to be in a mess of hot water, now that the hoax of the hate crime he reported...
Kraft Apologizes for Paying to Have Balls Deflated
CHOWDER, MASSACHUSETTS -- A spokesperson for Robert Kraft, owner of the New England Patriots football franchise, released the following statement just moments ago. Mr....
Trump Warns Dems He ‘Won’t Wait Two Full Years to Address the Next Made-Up...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump signed a resolution to stave off another government shutdown over the money he demanded for his...
Charlie Kirk and Ben Shapiro Locked in Bitter Custody Battle Over Shared Brain Cell
NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Today, papers were filed in New York district court to determine who will have custody of a single brain...
Liam Neeson On Shortlist for Trump’s Chief of Staff
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Chief of Staff position in the Trump administration has already seen three different men hold the title.
First, Reince Priebus left...
Trump: David Dennison Emailed John Barron to Have Individual-1 Direct President of Puerto Rico...
WASHINGTON. D.C. -- In an unforeseen and potentially earth shattering development, President Donald Trump has acknowledged that at least some facts in the disputed...
Trump Promises Supporters He’ll Never Die ‘Like That Cuck Bush’
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Despite prior tensions between the Bush family and President Donald Trump, the alleged billionaire and reality-TV host still ended up attending...
