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American Dental Association Says Lying Through Your Teeth Greatly Increases Risk of Covid-19 Infection
The American Dental Association has issued a statement advising that there is a "heightened risk" of contracting the novel coronavirus, or COVID-19 the more...
Report: Coronavirus Devastated, Despondent, and Suicidal
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Donald Trump has promised the American people several times in the last eight months he would defeat the coronavirus. Now, hours...
Trump Demands to Know Which Asshole Botched Covid So Bad He Got It
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The President of the United States and his wife Melania have tested positive for COVID-19.
RELATED: President Trump Promises Peaceful Transfer of...
300 lb. Toddler Throws 90-Minute Tantrum
CLEVELAND, OHIO -- A massive, 300-pound orange toddler stood on a stage with former Vice President Joe Biden last night and threw what scholars...
Trump Thought IRS Stood For “I Repulsed Stormy”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- According to an explosive new report in The New York Times, President Donald Trump paid only $750 in taxes in the years 2017...
Biden: “I Know Watching People Piss Might Be His Thing, But I Won’t Be...
DELAWARE -- President Donald Trump really, really, really wants former Vice President Joe Biden to take a drug test prior to tomorrow night's presidential debate. Trump...
In 2017, Trump Spent $750 in Taxes, and $750,000 in Big Macs
This weekend, The Failing Any Minute Now, We Promise, They Really ARE Failing New York Times published what in many circles is being called a "bombshell"...
Trump Issues The Constipation Proclamation
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In 1862, as the country fought in pitched battle during the Civil War, President Abraham Lincoln, the first Republican president, signed...
President Trump Promises Peaceful Transfer of Power to John Barron, David Dennison, or Bobby...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, President Donald Trump caused quite a commotion when he refused to tell a reporter that he'd promise to transfer power...
Taliban Endorses Judge Amy Coney Barrett for Supreme Court Justice
AFGHANISTAN -- The Taliban have issued the following statement, in their words "fully and completely endorsing fellow Religious Zealot" Judge Amy Coney Barrett to...
