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Trump Issues Executive Order for Bible Publishers to Delete Commandment Forbidding False Idols
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This week, during an impromptu press conference and rant session, President Donald Trump referred to himself as "the Chosen One." Trump...
God Clarifies Trump is the ‘Chosen One to Warn Others Not to Become Fat,...
KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Today, in what would be bizarre moment in literally any other period in American history, a sitting president called...
Denmark Says Greenland Will Be For Sale When Donald Trump Jr. Can Spell It
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Citing the fact that it was a day that ended in "Y," President Donald Trump got into yet another dust up...
Greenland Asks Trump How He Can Afford to Buy Them Without a Loan from...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, our sister publication Alternative Facts, published a report that President Donald Trump has already had his proposal to buy Greenland...
House Republican: Hillary Clinton Behind Epstein’s Death and His Dog Being Run Over While...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Congressman Tom Thompaulsen (R-AR) is convinced that former Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton is not only somehow connected to the...
El Paso Shooting Victim Asked If She Could Be Shot Instead of Getting a...
EL PASO, TX -- An victim of the deadly mass shooting in El Paso, Texas last week was being visited by the president when...
Call of Duty Designer Apologizes for Inspiring World War II
A man who worked on the design of one of the original "Call of Duty" video game has issued a statement apologizing for his...
Trump Promises to Write MAGA Bomber Every Day He’s in Prison
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last year, Cesar Sayoc sent pipe bombs to over a dozen prominent Democrats. Mr. Sayoc was eventually caught after an intense...
Nation Devastated to Find Out McConnell Will Probably Recover From Fall
Over the weekend, news broke that Senate Majority Leader and Satan's Best Friend Mitch McConnell fell and injured himself. Reportedly, Senator McConnell fell in...
Porn Site Reveals “Daddy/Daughter” As Most Searched Term In Trump States
If you're a Trump supporter, chances are you like a familiar brand of porn...literally.
