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Senate Republicans Warn Garland They Won’t Tolerate Him Behaving Like They Tolerated Bill Barr...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Senate Republicans sought assurances from President Joe Biden's nominee for the post that, if confirmed, he would not use the office...
Nation Grips Itself for Another Week Without a Presidential Golf Outing
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- For four years, if there was one thing Americans could come to rely on, it was not their president's rock steady...
United Airlines Ending Its Frequent Fuckface Miles Program
United Airlines has announced that after careful consideration of the events of the past 48 hours they will be ending their Frequent Fuckface Miles...
Devastated Underage Dominican Prostitutes Left Out Of Limbaugh’s Will
SANTO DOMINGO, DOMINICAN REPUBLIC -- In a shocking blow to the country, it is rumored that Rush Limbaugh's will left out his favorite Dominican...
Florida Drug Dealer Faces Financial Hardships
PALM BEACH, FLORIDA -- Ronald Crabtree, a low level Oxycontin street dealer, sits in a second hand LazyBoy recliner, shuffling through a Rolodex.
"This one...
Satan Tells Limbaugh to ‘Fuck Off Out Of Here’
HELL -- Satan "Billy" Beelzebub does not want recently deceased radio host Rush Limbaugh "anywhere within 500 eternal yards" of Hell, and he made...
Planned Parenthood Will Start Giving Away Free Guns With Abortions
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In response to what can only described as an onslaught of new, strict anti-abortion regulations in a growing number of red...
‘The Mandalorian’ Will Digitally Replace Gina Carano With AOC Wearing a Mask
BURBANK, CALIFORNIA -- It’s been a busy week for Disney Star Wars news, and today will be no different.
Following on the heels of "The Mandalorian"...
Would an Impeachment Conviction of Her Father Prevent Ivanka From Being First Lady Ever...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The second impeachment trial of Barack Obama's racist troll successor to the presidency is underway now. In the first day of...
High Energy Alpha Male Too Chickenshit to Testify Under Oath About the Insurrection He...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In the late 1990's President William Jefferson Clinton was ensnared in a political scandal that could have ended his presidency, and...
