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Cruz: If Women Wanted Input on Abortion, They ‘Should Have Been Born With a...
WASHINGTON, D.C. --Speaking at a prayer breakfast in the nation's capital this morning, Sen. Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun) signaled his support and even glee at...
Supreme Court Agrees to Decide if Precum Has Same Rights as Women
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, the country awoke to news that the Supreme Court of the United States had agreed to hear a case...
Stefanik Faces Surprise Challenge from Trump’s Dong for Conference Chair
"We'd only be affirming what everybody already knows is true." - House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (Q-CA)
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When they shoved Rep. Liz...
Jesus Gives Permission to MAGA to Worship Trump Instead
KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Jesus Hubert Christ, Executive Vice-President of Holy Trinity, Inc., told reporters today that he and his father have decided...
Cheney Accuses House GOP of Stealing Leadership Election from Her
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In a truly surprising turn of events, Rep. Liz Cheney (R-WY) has leveled an explosive allegation against the House Republicans that...
A Complete List of All the Awful Things Rush Limbaugh Has Said Since He...
On February 17, 2021, right-wing commentator and media icon Rush Limbaugh assumed room temperature. During his career spanning many decades, Limbaugh ingratiated himself to...
Boebert Demands Update from Biden White House on Windmill Cancer Vaccine
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- During an interview on NewsmaxTV, Rep. Lauren Boebert (Q-CO) demanded that the White House provide an "immediate and urgent update" on...
Greene: Oversight Board Should Have Forced Facebook to Bake Trump’s ‘Bullshit Cake’
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Given that she is one of former President Donald John Toadstool Cock Trump's most ardent supporters on the Hill, there are...
Ted Cruz Fell Asleep During Biden’s Speech and Had a Nightmare That People Actually...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- During President Joe Biden's first joint address to Congress last night, nobody expected elected Republicans to like much of what the...
Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Crack Dealer Endorses Randy Quaid in Newsom Recall
LAKE AMPHETAMINE, GEORGIA -- Bill "Peach Dick" Kusinphuchre is known in his part of rural Georgia as the "Crack Dealer to the Stars." Mainly,...
