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Trump Wants His New Space Force’s Guns To Go “PEW PEW!”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump reportedly surprised even his own administration officials when he directed the Department of Defense to begin the process...
Trump Administration Wants Planned Parenthood To Help With Separating Illegal Immigrant Children From Mothers
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, the Donald Trump administration turned heads and shocked perhaps a few million people when they announced that a partnership...
Trump Irate There Was No “Mission Accomplished” Banner On The White House When He...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources within the White House are saying that President Donald Trump was absolutely livid and flew into an emotional tirade when...
Un, Trump Dispute Who Legitimized Whom’s Fascist, Authoritarian Kakistocracy
AIR FORCE ONE -- The earliest reports of the historic summit between President Donald Trump and North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un are that...
Trump, Un Set ‘Hard And Fast’ Self-Fellatio Time Limit Ahead of Summit
SINGAPORE -- Representatives from President Donald Trump and North Korea's dictator Kim Jong Un announced via a joint statement today that they have agreed...
Trump Outraged Triple Crown Winner Justify Didn’t Have Hoof Over Heart During National Anthem
AIR FORCE ONE -- History was made this weekend when Justify became just the 13th horse in history to win the Triple Crown, but...
Leading Graduating Kindergartners, Trump Briefly Forgets Words to Pledge of Allegiance
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump experienced a brief moment of confusion when leading a local graduating kindergarten class in the Pledge...
Betsy DeVos Sees Nothing Wrong At All With Trump Administration’s Grasp Of History
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In less than a week's time, the Donald Trump administration has experienced two separate incidents that many would say show an...
On Call With Merkel, Trump Brings Up Taxation Without Representation
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The White House announced today that it will be going over their world history flashcards with President Donald Trump after two...
Scott Pruitt Looking For Dead Planet He Had Stuffed In Trump Hotel Mattress
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The scandal involving chief EPA Administrator Scott Pruitt's financial and administrative decisions shows no signs of going away any time soon.
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