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Dems Float Legislation Directing DHH To Allow Doctors To Refuse Treating Mouth Breathing Religious...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In response to the Trump administration's efforts to overhaul the Department of Health and Human Services to offer legal protections for...
Moscow Demands Trump Help End Putin’s Shadow Government Shutdown
MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- Russian President Vladimir Putin has sent a strongly worded letter to American President In Name Only Donald Trump, demanding that the...
Exhausted Trump Asks Staffers If They Can Take Fewer Pictures Pretending To Work During...
WASHINGTON D.C. -- The federal government is in the middle of its first shutdown during a time in which one party holds control of...
Trump Writing Book: “The Art Of Not Making Deals And Blaming It On Crooked...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Alt-Right Publishing has announced that they will begin printing more than just leaflets that are handed out at Nazi, Ku Klux...
U.S. Recruits Its Best Athlete To Winter Olympics Team
COLORADO SPRINGS, COLORADO -- In a surprising and completely unforeseen development, the United States Olympic Committee announced today that it has added the country's...
Trump Asks John Kelly If Taxpayers Will Still Pay For His Golf Outing Security...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources within the White House are telling reporters that this morning, President Trump seemed to be accepting of the fact that...
U.S. Adds Its Best Athlete To Winter Olympics Team And He Will Compete In...
COLORADO SPRINGS, COLORADO -- In a surprising and completely unforeseen development, the United States Olympic Committee announced today that it has added the country's...
Starburst Announces New Flavor: Trump’s Rectum
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS -- Over the weekend, word broke that Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) gave President Donald Trump a special gift -- a jar containing...
Trump Blames Weekend Missile Warning Scare On President Of Hawaii’s Incompetence
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This past weekend, residents in Hawaii were treated to quite a shock. In the early hours of Saturday morning local time,...
Trump’s Doctor Worried When Physical Reveals No Human Heart Or Brain
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Traditionally, American presidents as far back as the 1970's have submitted to an annual physical exam.
Roughly half of the men who...
