You haven’t spoken to your youngest child about anything meaningful for over a decade. Your other three children barely tolerate you, and you can feel their judgment every time you walk into their homes wearing your red hat. Your grandchildren all seem to have lost your phone number, and never call or even text you, not even the one that used to be your granddaughter but now is your grandson because they went to school one day a girl and came home a boy. What did you move to a red state and away from all of them for, if they’re just going to pretend you don’t exist to them?
You feel isolated and alone if you’re not in one of your sixty Facebook groups all named with a variation of “TRUMP FIRST, AMERICA EVENTUALLY, FUCK BROWN AND QUEER PEOPLE, BUT SOMEHOW STILL YAY JESUS!” It seems like you’ve become a pariah in your own family, and each email you forward them, warning of the Woke Mind Virus and its dangerous effects on American Patriotism just seems to make them even more avoidant of you.
But at least, thanks to scientists like Joe Rogan and certified geniuses like Elon Musk, you know who to blame whenever one of your racist jokes lands like a dead parrot. You know whose fault it is that you can’t just say whatever it is that you’re thinking without someone telling you what you think is based in lies, hatred, or hate-filled lies. And you also know the person to blame certainly isn’t you, the one with all the problematic stuff flying from their lips.
It’s DEI. It’s all DEI’s fault.
What’s DEI?
Who knows?
What’s DEI stand for?
Who cares?
It’s like the Bible or the Constitution. We don’t have to know what it is for us to know we don’t like it, right Patriots? In fact, we know that real American Patriots take personal accountability and that’s why you’re personally accountable for blaming everything on DEI, right? Right.
Got twenty minutes? Check this out.
