Totally Bulls*it News

Can I File an Extension If I’m Not Ready to Control My Wife By January 20th?

I don't really want to go to jail because I couldn't figure out how to wrangle my wife's genitals into their holding pen before...

A Sad, Disillusioned Trey Gowdy is Roaming the Halls of Congress, Offering to ‘Witch Hunt’ People

With his beloved Select Committee on Benghazi crumbling before his eyes, Trey Gowdy finds himself rudderless in Washington.

Paul Ryan Demands Goose That Lays Golden Eggs as Condition of Speakership

Paul Ryan once saw geese that laid golden eggs, and he's demanding one now as payment for his speakership.

Jim Webb Challenges Bernie Sanders to Arm Wrestle

Jim Webb is out of the presidential race for now, but that doesn't mean his competitive spirit has dulled.

After Cutting Planned Parenthood Medicaid Payments, Texas To Blow Up All Dams

Texas will no longer reimburse Planned Parenthood with the state's medicaid funds, and they're taking that concept to other parts of their budget too.

Tea Party/GOP Establishment Set Rules for Upcoming Rumble Over Speakership

Who will win the GOP rumble between the establishment and the Tea Party caucus?

Libertarian: Being Poor in America Not Bad Because Other People Are Poorer

One young libertarian explains why the middle class isn't really shrinking even though it's shrinking.

Obama’s Gun Confiscation Count: Week #351

Can Obama's Gun Confiscation ever be reined in?

Dick Cheney ‘Hella Bummed’ Trump Not Also Blaming Him For 9/11

The former Vice-President has a sad over not getting credit for the Bush Administration's blundering of 9/11 intelligence.

Huckabee and Santorum Spend Long, Intimate Night Planning Anti-Gay Rhetoric

Rick Santorum and Mike Huckabee got up close and personal in an effort to combat a mutual enemy -- two adults loving each other.

Congressional GOP Hastily Prepping Bible Stack, Witch Cakes For Clinton’s Benghazi Testimony

House Republicans are preparing "special interrogative devices" for when Hillary Clinton testifies at their Benghazi hearing later this week.