Totally Bulls*it News

Putin Expresses Concern About Incoming American Dictatorship

Totally Bulls*it News Ben Fletcher -
Moscovia, Kievan Rus’ — Following Donald Trump’s inauguration, Vladimir Putin, pictured above shitting his pants at the mention of President Zelenskyy, today called a surprise...
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Totally Bulls*it News

Trump Explains Why Freedom of Religion Only Applies to Christians

Constitutional scholar Donald Trump tells a crowd why one of the Constitution's most important protections doesn't apply to Muslims.
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

FDA Rushing Approval of Antidote to American Islamaphobia

American Islamaphobia has gotten so rampant that the FDA is working hard to get a cure for it to market.
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Actual Pile of Human Excrement Offers to Be 2016 GOP Nominee

Can a new underdog emerge and challenge Donald Trump for the GOP nomination?
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

President-Elect Donald Trump Wants Muslim Immigrants ‘Freshly Showered’ Upon Arrival

Donald Trump wants Islamic immigrants to be clean. REALLY clean.
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Trump Adviser Explains Why Muslims ‘Need Their Own Air Supply’

Trump has an idea for national security -- give Muslims their own, special oxygen supply barracks.
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Adolf Hitler Tired of Being Compared to Donald Trump

Adolf Hitler thinks Donald Trump is a poser, and he wants him to stop biting his "fascistic style."
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Man Who Can’t Find Woman Willing To Sleep With Him Gives Opinions on Abortion Anyway

This guy can't get laid to save his life, but once he does he has a no abortion option for any woman who takes a chance on him.
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

House Hunting American Muslim Family ‘Thrilled’ With Hidden Annex They’ve Found

One American Muslim family has found what they think is their next home.
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

State Republican Hires Criminal to Advise Which Gun Laws He WOULD Obey

One Republican has a new idea for determining which -- if any -- gun laws he'll support.
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Local Libertarian: Child Porn Should Be Legal Because Criminals Don’t Follow Laws

One libertarian's view of child pornography through the prism of government overreach.
James Schlarmann -
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