Totally Bulls*it News

Trump Just Ordered Epstein Island Relocated to Gulf of America

"...we can just hook up a couple bungee cords to the island, then tie those to one of our, you know, big ship thingies...

President Obama to Personally Fly Drone Over Site of Bundy’s Rebellion

White House aides are saying the Oregon standoff may force the president to take decisive action.

Daesh Uses Trump’s Wife in Recruitment Porn

Terrorist group Daesh already started using Donald Trump in its recruitment videos, and now they've started using his wife Melania.

PA Department of Corrections Orders Jumpsuits With Garish Patterns

Will Bill Cosby have special garments to wear if he's convicted?

Leaked Script from ‘Thelma & Louise 2’ Staring Donald Trump and Vladmir Putin

Donald Trump and Vlad Putin are so cozy, they plan to make a movie together.

Muslim State Senator Wants All Christian Churches Monitored 24/7

Could new legislation in New York make Christian churches in the states targets of special scrutiny?

Fat Albert Officially Files for Emancipation from Bill Cosby

Bill Cosby has a warrant out for his arrest, and one of his Cosby kids wants nothing to do with him anymore.

Pataki Quits Race, Calls Trump ‘Obnoxious Bewigged Fuckface’ and Challenges Him to Fistfight

On his way out of the 2016 Republican primary, George Pataki says he wants a piece of Donald Trump.

The Political Garbage Chute’s Do’s and Don’ts For Raping Daesh Soldiers

In response to the terrorist group's fatwa on the proper care and handling of rape victims, TPGC has put together its own guide to raping Daesh terrorists.

Company Develops ‘Cop-Proof’ Mask for ‘Urban’ Americans

One New England company has a product designed to keep urban Americans safe from police shootings.