Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

God to Michele Bachmann: Shut your stupid fuckin’ mouth

God has had enough of Michele Bachmann speaking for him.

Dick Cheney Endorses Donald Trump For His Waterboarding Comments After Belgium Attack

Donald Trump picks up a yooge endorsement from a fellow a-hole.

Hillary Clinton Literally Sharpening Her Claws in Preparation for Showdown With Trump

Hillary Clinton doesn't appear to be messing around when it comes to preparing for Trump.

Random Woman: I have no clue who the fuck the guy that just endorsed Trump is.

Some guy endorsed Trump over the weekend, and this woman has no idea who he is.

Ted Cruz: Let me be the AIDS to rid our party of Trump’s Cancer

Ted Cruz draws an interesting analogy between himself and Trump.

Obama’s Gun Confiscation Count: Week #372

Did Obama's Gun Confiscation Unit come to YOUR town this week?

Obama Offers to Trade SCOTUS Pick for Second Amendment

Obama reportedly has an offer for Mitch McConnell on his SCOTUS nomination.

Trump to Erect Wall In Front of Next Rally

Trump has a new place he'd like to erect something.