Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Soldier Deployed At Border Hopes His Kevlar Vest Is Rock-Proof

LOS CHINGADORES DE CULEROS NARANJOS, TEXAS -- Since last week, President...

Trump Not Happy with Pence’s Halloween Costume

Washington D.C. -- According to leaks from within the West Wing...

Trump Offers Citizenship to Anchor Babies Who Sign Up For Space Force

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump could reportedly be signing an...

White House Offers Compromise: Birthright Citizenship For White Babies Only

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump set the American...

Trump Wants MAGABomber For Postmaster General

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump is reportedly unhappy with the...

Brett Kavanaugh Jealous Democrats Got Bombed While He Had To Listen To Boring Court Cases

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- While the nation was gripped with headlines this...