Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Trump Says He Can’t Be Impeached Until Dems Impeach Individual-1 First

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, the House Judiciary Committee approved and...

President Commemorates The Day His Skyscraper Became the Tallest Building in New York

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At a solemn ceremony this morning, President Donald...

Trump Considering Sarah Palin as National Insecurity Adviser

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Citing what he called "extremely fart-tudinous circumstantials," President...

Trump Wonders If ‘Obama And Crooked H’s Deep State’ Were Behind 9/11 Too

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald Trump took time to...

MAGA Boy Pretty Sure He Can Insult His Way into AOC’s Stupid Commie Pants

RICCI RIVER, NEW JERSEY -- If there's one thing that 35...

“I Guess I’ll Just Have to Bomb Iran All By Myself!”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A visibly upset John Bolton was seen angrily...

Rally Crowd Shocked and Dismayed When President Tells a Single Truth

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At a campaign rally in North Carolina this...

New 2020 Polls Show Chrissy Teigen Leads President P**sy A** B**ch In Head-to-Head Matchup

Currently, the RealClearPolitics polling averages show that next year's presidential election could leave...

President Invites Sarah Palin to Become His Third First Lady

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Within a matter of minutes after finding out...

Chrissy Teigen and The DNC Just Unveiled a New 2020 Slogan

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Democratic National Committee has unveiled a new...