Totally Bulls*it News

Why Did The Secretary of Defense Text Me Dick Pics and Nuclear Launch Codes?

"I'm Prince of War now, got it? I'll do what I want. Text what and who I want." Well, that was a new one. I...

Ken Starr Asked Monica Lewinsky For Presidential Blowjob Advice Before His Impeachment Defense of Trump

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, during the White House legal counsel's second...

Trump Unable to Identify His Kids on Unlabeled Family Photo

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, President Donald John Trump was given...

Trey Gowdy Sure Does Wish Obama Had Been as ‘Concerned’ About Ukrainian Corruption as Trump

FORT DUMFUK, SOUTH CAROLINA -- Former Congressman Trey Gowdy (R-SC) was...

Bolton Agrees to Give House Democrats Audible Version of His New Book

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Former National Security Adviser John Bolton has agreed...

Graham: “If the Media Were Nicer to Trump, He Wouldn’t Have Tried to Extort Ukraine”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- With Republicans holding onto a small majority in...

Asked to Find America on a Map With No Labels, Pompeo Points to Russia

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Secretary of State Mike Pompeo was unable to...

President’s Legal Team Delivers Blistering Defense of Wanting to F_ _ k Your Own Daughter

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, after 24-hours of presentations by the...

Trump Explains Yovanovitch Tape: He Meant “Take Her Out” for Hamberders and Covfefe

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump has yet another potential scandal...

Hawley: “The Democrats Are Really Terrified We’re Going to Impeach Hunter Biden”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- For Freshman Senator Josh Hawley's (R-MO), Rep. Adam...