Totally Bulls*it News

She Told Her Boyfriend She’s Keeping Her Vote Secret Until He Finds Her Clit

Regular readers will recall that one of the things we pride ourselves on most here is our ability to secure interviews with the nation's...

Trump Orders Brad Pitt Sent to Gitmo for ‘Treasonous’ Oscars Speech

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald J. Trump has issued an official...

Stephen Miller’s Hair Says It Doesn’t See Anything Unnatural or Fake Looking About Trump’s Face

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- White House Senior Fascism Adviser Stephen Miller's hair...

Devin Nunes Assures Trump He Won’t Stop Sucking Him Off Even Though Impeachment Trial Is Over

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sources are reporting that late last night, Congressman...

Trump Frustrated With Iowa Caucuses Because He Doesn’t Know Who to Have Ukraine Investigate Next

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A clearly perturbed President Donald Trump told reporters...

Racist Old Man: “That Other Racist Old Man Isn’t Really That Racist”

A rich, racist old man on a cable news television show...

Trump Will Host Summer Kool-Aid Kountry Kookout for Supporters and Congressional Republicans

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A confident and clearly rejuvenated President Donald Trump...

Citing Trump’s Impeachment, Son of Sam Requests Retrial With No Witnesses or Documents

NEW YORK -- Attorneys for the convicted serial killer known as...