A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

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Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true. At least, she’s not a fan of transgender women. For some reason, which only the billionaire Harry Potter author can tell us what that might be, she doesn’t seem as obsessed about trying to take away trans men’s rights.

At any rate, JK Rowling’s not just the world’s most authority on radical anti-transgender feminism. She’s also becoming the world’s foremost Nazi defender. Take for instance when Rowling — who identified herself as “JK” to obfuscate (some might even say “change”) her gender identity from the more feminine-sounding “Joanne” to sell books — recently fended off accusations that transgender people were targeted by Nazis for encampment and extermination. I did not have “the woman who wrote a book about standing up to fascism and bigotry goose-stepping herself in front of Nazi criticisms,” on my 2024 Bingo card, but hey, it’s the 90’s, anything’s possible, right?

Leaning heavily on not being able to find a personally hand-signed order to round up and murder all the transgender people in Germany at the time, Rowling insisted, breathlessly, that trans people were not actual targets of the Final Solution. That, in turn, got Rowling labeled as a Holocaust denier by many who are experts on the subject because, well, without a doubt transgender people were rounded up and killed as part of the Holocaust. It seemed like pretty cut and dried example of someone in way over their skis saying something easily verifiably wrong just to make a politically-charged, biased point.

Writer Rivkah Brown took Rowling’s tweets at face value and tweeted that the children’s book author was being, in fact a Holocaust denier by denying facts about the Holocaust. But Rivkah should have kept two things in mind.

One, Rowling is a billionaire, and in the Western World, we let billionaires be bullies and bigots because, well, “reasons.” Secondly, she should have remembered that she lives in the UK, and as such she’s subject to Britain’s defamation and libel laws, which protect billionaires from the consequences of their own words and actions.

So, Rowling used those laws and threatened Brown with a lawsuit, alleging libel. About a month later, Brown tweeted an apology to Rowling, saying the Holocaust denialism “allegation was false and offensive.” But, to those of us not too rich to upend and eject critical thinking from our brains, it seemed the opposite of false, which I believe, if I’m not mistaken, is true.

It seems like Rowling has the money and the law behind her, and there’s just not much someone who has compassion, empathy, and a human heart will be able to do to call Joanne out for her strident transphobic/Nazi defender cocktail she keeps sucking down like Rudy Giuliani at an open bar hosted by Vlad Putin.

But then, as I was coming home the other day, I came upon something I’d never seen before: a Bald Eagle standing watch, protecting an American flag. As I walked by, the eagle called me over. Needless to say, I was intrigued.

“Hey! Hey, hey you,” the eagle shouted, smoking a joint and listening to Bad Religion on its earpods, “come here. I wanna remind you of something.”

It seemed urgent, so I sidled up to him and asked the Eagle what he wanted.

“Just so you know, and you do with this information whatever you see fit, Jambo,” the eagle began, “but I thought you should really know this. Joanne Rowling can’t use UK laws to silence Americans. The Constitution says she can go fuck herself.”

When I figure out what to do in relation to the Holocaust denier JK Rowling with the information the bald eagle gave me, I’ll update this post.

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