James Schlarmann

Comedian/Satirist/Amateur Burrito Wrangler

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I think a woman is programmed by God himself to be my willing sex and food preparation slave." If there's one thing we all know about abortion bans, it's that they keep...

I Have a Wish List of Things Dark Brandon Should Do With His Presidential Immunity

Some people might really think that if the Supreme Court says presidents have immunity from prosecution  -- even for attempting coups -- that we're headed in the wrong direction as a country. And sure, if you're one of those libtarded cucks who thinks self-governance...
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Putin Revokes Brennan’s Security Clearance

MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- Former CIA Director John Brennan has been stripped of his security...

Obama Can’t Guarantee He Never Heard N-Word

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Asshole Really Wants To Give You His Asshole Opinion

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Local Man Just Wants to Ensure Immigrants Are Generally Smarter and More Capable Than Himself And Other Idiotic Americans

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Trump Says Mexico Will Pay For His Wall By Funding His New Space Force

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- While there has been much buzz and speculation about the Trump...

Trump Suggests NFL Players Protest Police Brutality With Tiki Torches, Swastikas, and Weapons

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- For the past three years, the NFL has been grappling with...

Hillary Clinton Circling Omarosa’s Building Shouting, ‘Lock Her Up!’

At the time of publication, eyewitnesses are reporting that former Secretary of State Hillary...

Putin Wants to Compare Tapes With Omarosa

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Americans Prepare To Launch Their Affordable Healthcare, Universal Education Into Space

All over the country, Americans are talking about President Donald Trump's proposed Space Force,...

Laura Ingraham Kicked Out of Dry Cleaners For Arguing With Staff After She Lost The Ticket To Claim Her White Robe

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Authorities at this hour are confirming that right-wing radio...

Pat Robertson Blames California Wildfires On State Not Picking Trump In 2016

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- While multiple wildfires engulf parts of California, world famous televangelist...

Steven Seagal Looking Forward To Piss Whores

MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- Former alleged actor and martial artist Steven Seagal will be the...

Latest articles

Florida’s Abortion Ban Has This Incel Considering a Move to Florida to Start a New Rape Family

"...Big Feminazi has poisoned the women in my life against me just because I...

I Have a Wish List of Things Dark Brandon Should Do With His Presidential Immunity

Some people might really think that if the Supreme Court says presidents have immunity...

You Can’t Call Me an “Incel” If I Fuck My Cybertruck

The following editorial was written and submitted by right-wing author and 2020 Trump Campaign...

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....