Yearly Archives: 2020

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Totally Bulls*it News

Trump Orders Toyota to Produce Vaccine for “Corollavirus”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald J. Trump has issued and official...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

NRA Backs Trump’s Proposed ‘Second Amendment Cure’ for Coronavirus

FAIRFAX, VIRGINIA -- The National Rifle Association has released a statement...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

She Didn’t Want to Be a Bernie Bro, She Was Just 22 and Liked Policies That Made Her Future Brighter

Kirsten Tomjanovich is a Bernie Bro. Yes, she's biologically a female,...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Trump Awards Tiger Woods Presidential Medal of Adultery

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last year, President Donald Trump gave golf champion...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Trump: Space Force Converting the Moon Into a Death Star

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Having consolidated his power after the Battle of...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

CDC Issues Guidelines for Safe Handjobs During Coronavirus Outbreak

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Centers for Disease Control issued a new...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Coronavirus Update: CDC Strongly Urges People to Stop Licking Each Other’s Nostrils

WASHINGTON, D.C -- The Centers for Disease Control have issued a...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Bloomberg Grateful for Chance to Spend Fortune on Campaign Rather Than Helping Poor People Eat

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- With Super Tuesday in the books,...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

Man: “You’re Voting for the Wrong Person You Fucking Idiot”

The following is an editorial opinion piece written by Dick Whistler,...
James Schlarmann -
Totally Bulls*it News

We Interviewed a 2-Month Old Fetus and Got Its Feelings on Abortion

In 1973, the United States Supreme Court ruled in Roe vs....
James Schlarmann -
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