Yearly Archives: 2019

Tomi Lahren: “Everyone Knows Mermaids Are White, Just Like Santa and Jesus!”

LA CULERA RUBIA ARRUGADA, CALIFORNIA -- Fox News contributing racist muppet...

Pat Robertson Says California Earthquake Was God Clapping for Trump’s 4th of July Parade

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Though he didn't give his Independence Day...

George Washington Ended a Terror Attack With a Solo Flight in His Stealth Bomber

For this week's installment of Unreal History, we present the story...

Tennessee Man Can’t Figure Out Why Black Friends Don’t Like His Confederate Flag Display

One man in Tennessee just can't figure out why his black friends wouldn't be stoked on his Confederate Flag display.

Trump Blames 4th of July Rain on ‘Bob Mueller’s Team of Angry Democrats’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, President Donald Trump got his wish and...

Historians Unearth George Washington’s Pilot License

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Researchers at the national archives have uncovered a...

Native American Man Spends July 4th Telling Americans To ‘Go Back’ Where They Came From

FALLBROOK, CALIFORNIA -- Tommy Curro, a member of the Pala Native...

President Trump Hopes Americans Appreciate How Hard Sucking Your Own D*ck In Front of Tanks Really Is

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Trump is, according to one senior staffer,...

Trump Orders New ‘Specialized’ ICE Squad For Hispanic Arrests and Deportations

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump signed an executive order on...