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Alabama Authorities Are Looking for Me Because They Found Out I Had a Wet Dream

"I can't tell you where I'm at, or how long I'll be here, but...

I Just Got a Sneak Peak at Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Signature Shoe Line

"I lied to him and told him that I was a friend of the...
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Turkey Passes On Trump’s Presidential Pardon

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's been a longstanding tradition in America for the sitting president...

Trump Orders the Execution of All Thanksgiving Turkeys Pardoned By Obama

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The first thing President Donald Trump did this morning, after he...

Turkey Passes On Presidential Pardon From Trump

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's been a longstanding tradition in America for the sitting president...

Turkey Passes On Pardon From Trump

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's been a longstanding tradition in America for the sitting president...

Trump Pardons John Wilkes Booth

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Just hours after announcing he was going to be issuing a...

Trump Investigating Constitutionality Of Post-Dated Self Pardons

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As legal turmoil and chaos swirl around the 45th President of...

Literal Piece Of Shit Considers Challenging Arpaio For AZ Senate Seate

GRIFFIN BEACH, ARIZONA -- Sheriff Joe Arpaio, the 85 year old controversial law enforcement...

Trump Preemptively Pardons Himself for Pardoning Himself for Things He Says He Didn’t Do

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump's Russian headaches will not go away. For over a...

White House Announces Donald Jr. As Turkey To Be Pardoned

THE WHITE HOUSE -- Speaking to reporters earlier today about the arrangements for this...

Trump Orders Execution of All Thanksgiving Turkeys Obama Pardoned

"I don't want to waste pardons on people who aren't related to me."

Trump Preemptively Pardons Himself for Pardoning Himself for Things He Says He Didn’t Do

"We don't put people on trial for attempting to commit a crime, do we?"

Trump Pre-Pardons Himself for Pardoning Himself for Things He Said He Didn’t Do

If Trump pardons himself, he may put himself in even deeper legal waters. So he needs to pre-pardon himself for pardoning himself. Get it?

Latest articles

Alabama Authorities Are Looking for Me Because They Found Out I Had a Wet Dream

"I can't tell you where I'm at, or how long I'll be here, but...

I Just Got a Sneak Peak at Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Signature Shoe Line

"I lied to him and told him that I was a friend of the...

Why Aren’t Liberals Grateful to Live in the World’s Most Exceptional Shooting Range?

The following editorial was written by right-wing commentator and former NRA executive board member...

What DO You Get The Horse-Faced Cave Troll Insurrectionist In Your Life for Valentine’s Day?

"...a lovely new feedbag might be the way to go. But she just signed...