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I Asked a Klansman If He’s Voting For Biden Since They’re Both Democrats. He Punched Me.

"Man, it's really true what they say about Democrats. They're snowflakes." We all know a...

For Conservatives, Fart Naps Are Quickly Replacing Power Naps

"While some might casually observe the irony in someone who belittles his opponent as...
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Florida Bans Teaching Any Pronouns to Any Student at Any Grade Level

https://youtu.be/4f5eSK0bp5s TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDUH -- Republicans in The Gunshine State have pushed a new law through...

Matt Gaetz Worried He’ll Have to Leave Florida if “Don’t Say Gay Bill” is an Anti-Grooming Law

Friends and associates of Congressman Matt Gaetz (Q-FL) -- both of them -- have...

Mike Pence ‘Disturbed and Outraged’ By How Turned On He Got Reading New Bisexual “Superman”

GILEAD, INDIANA -- Last week, DC Comics published an edition of "Superman" that garnered...

Dave Chapelle’s Therapist Confident She’ll Send Her Kids to Ivy League Schools

We can't reveal her real name, but recently one of our reporters sat down...

This Doughy Coward Wouldn’t Defend His Wife’s Looks But Has Thoughts on Macho Soldiers

When one envisions Senator Ted Cruz (Q-Cancun), they don't exactly conjure up a mental...

Attack Helicopter Identifies as Someone Who Thinks You’re a Transphobic Douchebag

Choppy McChopperson has lived their entire life as a Boeing AH-65 Apache attack helicopter,...

Trans Woman Unsure If JK Rowling Wants Her to Identify With Voldemort or Harry Now

CHERRY FALLS, RHODE ISLAND -- Sheila Williams loves Harry Potter, and she loves the...

Mike Pence Grateful Trump Can’t Fire Him Now

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Just before noon today, Vice President Mike Pence reportedly heaved the...

Mike Pence Orders All Pride Flags Moved From U.S. Embassies and Into His Den of Sin Where They Belong

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- June is "Pride Month" in the LGTBQ community, which means it's...

Boston Straight Pride Parade Gives Mike Pence Full-On Chubby

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Whether or not the city of Boston permits a "straight pride"...

Alabama GOP Demands “Arthur” Air Episode Where He Marries His Sister

BAISEURS DE COUSIN EN ARRIÉRE PARISH, ALABAMA -- On May 13th, 2019, PBS aired...

Pat Robertson Warns: God Will Send Hurricanes to All 50 States If ‘Gays Keep Getting Married’

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has an ominous warning for America: Stop...

Latest articles

I Asked a Klansman If He’s Voting For Biden Since They’re Both Democrats. He Punched Me.

"Man, it's really true what they say about Democrats. They're snowflakes." We all know a...

For Conservatives, Fart Naps Are Quickly Replacing Power Naps

"While some might casually observe the irony in someone who belittles his opponent as...

Surely, We Don’t Expect Republicans to Suck Their Cult Leader Off All The Way from D.C.?

"Does anyone know how hard it is to have a long-distance relationship, much less...

A Firehose That Spews Diarrhea Told Me It’s Been Holding Mock Debates With Joe Biden

"...I'm not Harvey Keitel or Bobby DeNiro or anything, but I guess all that...