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Criminal Justice

Donald Trump Finding Out

Well...shit. How did this end up happening, anyway? Doesn't everyone indicting him understand the rules have...
Economy

I Live in Arkansas. Can My 10 Year Old Work as a Bouncer at a Drag Bar?

I moved to Arkansas before I was a father, so I can't say that...
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Science & Medicine

Hurricane Dorian Makes Preemptive Strike Against U.S. Nuclear Arsenal

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- At the time of publication, the Pentagon is confirming that the...
MAGA News

Bush Says Trump Should Know How to Pronounce ‘Nookular Weapons’ Before He Uses Them on Hurricanes

CABEZA MIERDA, TEXAS -- Former President George W. Bush left the public spotlight in...
MAGA News

Trump: “I Didn’t Consider Nuking Hurricanes Because Everyone Knows You Nuke Tornadoes”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This past weekend, Axios published a story that suggested President Donald Trump has...
LGTBQ+

Pat Robertson Warns: God Will Send Hurricanes to All 50 States If ‘Gays Keep Getting Married’

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has an ominous warning for America: Stop...
Religion

Pat Robertson Begs ‘The Gays’ to Only Do ‘Hand and Mouth Stuff’ Until After Hurricane Season

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson told a podcast audience this week that...
LGTBQ+

Robertson: God Probably Won’t Smite America With Hurricanes Over ‘Rimming And Outer-Play’

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Perhaps in an attempt to quell growing furor over comments...
Science & Medicine

National Weather Administration Will Rename Next Hurricane “Sherman”

After Harvey, Irma, and Jose all dissipate, a weather agency will rename the next hurricane to hit the region "Hurricane Sherman."
Conservative Media

Kirk Cameron Gives God Credit For Hurricanes, Satan Takes Credit for Kirk Cameron

Satan has revealed a secret business relationship with one of Hollywood's most lovable, formerly relevant child actors turned Jesus freaks.

Latest articles

Criminal Justice

Donald Trump Finding Out

Well...shit. How did this end up happening, anyway? Doesn't everyone indicting him understand the rules have...
Economy

I Live in Arkansas. Can My 10 Year Old Work as a Bouncer at a Drag Bar?

I moved to Arkansas before I was a father, so I can't say that...
LGTBQ+

Jesus: “Silencing Transgender People Isn’t Christian, It’s Cunty”

"I specifically told people to stop being judgmental little twatwaffles to everyone." In Montana, elected...
Criminal Justice

A Complete List of All the 2024 Presidential Candidates Currently on Trial for Rape

In New York City, a former President of the United States is being sued...

© James Schlarmann (All Material is Satirical)