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Attorney General

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...
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Researchers Identify New Strain of Aggressive Rectal Cancer and Name It “William Barr”

LAKE CRISE CONSTITUTIONNELLE, MICHIGAN -- A new, fast moving and particularly aggressive form of...

Barr Writes Four Page Summary of Book of Genesis Exonerating God for Great Flood

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Attorney General William Barr held a press conference at the Department...

Trump: ‘I Didn’t Obstruct Justice, I Just Tried to Impede an Investigation!’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, President Donald Trump lashed out the media, Democrats, and Special...

Jeff Sessions Can Finally Unwind, Smoke a Doob, and Forget About Persecuting Brown People Awhile

GREEN FIELD SPRINGS, CALIFORNIA -- Just after former Attorney General Jeff Sessions announced his...

Jeff Sessions Admits He’s a Member Of the Keebler Klux Klan

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The nation's capital is abuzz with rampant rumor and speculation after...

Jeff Sessions Can’t Recall Why Anyone Ever Thought He’s Competent at Anything

Attorney General Jeff Sessions might have a few issues with his memory. And he can't figure out why anyone every thought he was good at anything he did.

Petition Started to Remove Confederate Monument from Attorney General’s Office

A new petition is circulating online to have a racist monument to the Confederacy removed from the office the Attorney General of the United States.

Jeff Sessions Promises to Make it Clearer When He’s Telling a Racist Joke

Attorney General Jeff Sessions thinks he may have figured out a way to signal to the American people when he's just cracking a racist joke.

Shock! Jeff Sessions Admits He’s a Member Of the Keebler Klux Klan

Attorney General Jeff Sessions says that his membership in a shadowy group of cookie bakers is really nothing to worry about.

Alternate Universe Report: GOP Not Concerned With Clinton’s Attorney General Lying About Russian Meetings

In an alternate universe, Republicans would really be just fine with Russian collusion with President Hillary Clinton's team.

Jeff Sessions Starts Smoking Weed To Alleviate The Stress Of Russia Scandal

Attorney General Jeff Sessions may just have some really big, personal reasons for taking up that devil's weed sometime in the near future.

5 Fun Facts About Senator Jeff Sessions

Need to know about our next Attorney General, Jeff Sessions? Look no further than this set of fun factoids, lovingly curated.

Latest articles

A Bald Eagle Protecting an American Flag Reminded Me Holocaust Denier JK Rowling Can’t Sue Me

Author JK Rowling is not a fan of transgender people, that much is true....

Hillary Clinton Told Me She Has the Free Time to Be a Juror for Trump’s Trials

"...nothing would make me happier than to help make sure Donald Trump got the...

The State of Arizona Just Sent Me the Pink Slip for My Wife’s Uterus

"...my wife and I weren't planning any excursions through Arizona to begin with. However,...

Marjorie Taylor Greene Told Me Her New Theory: Hunter’s Dick Pics Caused New York’s Earthquakes

"...when I was researching Hunter's dick pics again last night, I noticed something I...