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Trump Threatens to Throw His Bone Spurs at Mattis
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's a feud perhaps no one on the Hill thought would ever go public, because one of the combatants is notoriously...
Trump Blames Antifa for His Small Hands, Mangled Dick, and Obsession with Superior Black...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's not a very well-kept secret that President Donald Trump wants Americans to fear AntiFa, though privately he's admitted to aides...
4 out of 5 Morons Agree: Trump is a Good President
A new scientific study indicates that 80% of all morons agree that Donald J. Trump, the guy who was a D-List reality TV competition...
Trump: “This Book Has Absolutely No Pictures of Titties In It”
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, President Donald Trump cited the Insurrection Act of 1807 and had federal officers use tear gas to disperse peaceful protesters...
Trump Thought Secret Service Would Take Him Golfing When He Begged to Be Put...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Protests against police brutality have erupted all over the country since footage of a Minneapolis police officer kneeling on a black...
Trump Signs Executive Order Demanding Facebook and Twitter Make Him Look Attractive and Competent
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump proved his small-government, traditionally conservative values today when he signed an executive order demanding that private companies that...
Trump Demands Twitter Give Alternative Fact-Checks to Democrat Tweets
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump is not pleased at all that Twitter slapped fact-check labels on two of his tweets yesterday, and his...
Twitter to Start Putting “Emotionally Fragile Idiot” Label on Trump Tweets
SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Yesterday, for the first time ever, Twitter applied real-time fact checks to tweets created and sent by the most...
Twitter Won’t Pull Down Trump’s Tweets About Fucking Jack Dorsey’s Mom
SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Twitter has officially declined to pull down tweets sent on their platform my President Donald J. Trump, despite them...
Poll: Majority of Americans Wish Trump’s Mom Had Been Pro-Choice
As the election draws closer, there's little doubt that President Donald Trump believes he's reliant in large part on the votes of conservative evangelical...
