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He Spent $150 on “Let’s Go Brandon” Merch and Now Biden Won’t Let Him...
COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- On the latest episode of his podcast, Jethro Bohiggins told his audience he was in the process of hiring...
CEO Blames Inflation for His 400% Bonus This Year
In late March of 2020, Ener-Go Enterprises shut down the majority of its onsite operations, laid off 30% of its workforce, and asked the...
Judge Schroeder Invites Rittenhouse Over for Thanksgiving Dinner
KENOSHA, WISCONSIN -- This morning, Alternative Facts reported that Wendy Rittenhouse, mother of acquitted murderer Kyle Rittenhouse, wasn't sure which table her son should sit at...
Wisconsin Legalizes Murder While White
KENOSHA, WISCONSIN -- Though it's not how laws are traditionally written in the state, a jury in Wisconsin has made the act of committing...
Bleach and Coat Hangers Sold Out in 65% of Texas Counties
In well over half of the counties in Texas, consumers won't be able to find any household bleach, or buy any new coat hangers...
Texas Woman Files Paperwork to Reclassify Her Genitals as a Firearm
LIBTERTAD de CUERPA, TEXAS -- Next week, a court in Texas will hear opening arguments in a case that could have wide-ranging impacts in...
“Let Me Explain Why Rapists Might Be Entitled to $10,000” by Gov. Greg Abbott
The following editorial was written by Gov. Greg Abbott (Taliban-TX), concerning his state's new 6-week abortion ban. Included in the law is a provision...
Biden Administration Working With Local Churches and Klan Chapters to Get MAGAs Vaccinated
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Getting more Americans vaccinated against COVID-19 and its rapidly moving delta variant is a key initiative of the Biden administration. Since...
McCarthy: Greene Could Chair Horse Faced Cave Troll Committee If GOP Retakes House
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Though they're still more than a year away, Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (Q-CA) has already begun previewing how things might change,...
Small Government Conservative Wants Critical Race Theory Banned in Schools, Public, and Homes
REAGAN RIVER, OHIO -- For his entire life, 48-year-old William Palumbicci has professed his love of what he calls "true, rock-ribbed, dyed-in-the-wool conservative values."...
