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55,000 Dead Americans Agree: It’s Important to Recognize How Mean The Press Is To...
As of the time of publication, the United States of America has officially reported 55,564 deaths from the pandemic outbreak of COVID-19, or the...
Trump Boys Mortuaries Opens Across America’s Heartland
NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Never shy about a business venture opportunity, the presidents' two midly cogent older sons, Eric and his brother Donald...
Donald Trump Jr: “Americans Need to Go Back to Pretending to Work Like Me”
"My daddy always said if I can do something, literally any fucking moron in the world can do it, too."
Trump Says Americans Without Toilet Paper Can Wipe With the Constitution Like He Does
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As his administration grapples with how to best coax states into restarting their economies, President Donald Trump addressed an issue related...
Kellyanne Conway Says The Trump Economy Can ‘Easily Handle’ 17 Million Americans Filing for...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As President Donald Trump tries to help the nation navigate what he and his coronavirus response task force believe will be...
Alex Jones Says Trump Administration Can Use Anti-Coronavirus Chemtrails to Protect Americans
CABEZA MIERDA SPRINGS, TEXAS -- Far-right shock jock Alex Jones went off on quite the rant during a recent edition of his no-award winning...
Kellyanne Conway: “The Trump Economy Can Easily Handle 6.6 Million Americans Filing for Alternative...
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, President Donald Trump tried to brace the nation for what he and his coronavirus response task force believe will be...
Poll: 70% of Americans Believe Trump Should Self-Quarantine in Hole Six Feet Underground
The results of a new poll, released just today, indicate that seven out of ten Americans believe that President Donald Trump should self-quarantine during...
CDC Recommends Americans Quarantine Themselves From President Trump
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The Centers for Disease Control issued new guidance this morning, urging Americans to quarantine themselves from a virus they say "is...
Poll: Most Americans Would Rather Have 4 More Years of Coronavirus Than Trump
As the country sits on the edge of its seat and holds its collective breath wondering if a pandemic outbreak of the novel coronavirus...
